It's not that bad...it's just a funk...one that's already going away...just need to get it out. No garage doors and tail pipes for me...LOL.
May just go out to the Ranch and watch some try outs...it always makes me happy out there. :o)
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Funk
Ever have those days when you feel like complete and total shit? Not sick, but emotionally. One of those days when you look in the mirror and all you see are the bad things...the gray hairs, the wrinkles, every possible imperfection, the extra weight...everything wrong and nothing right. One of those days when you think about your life and where you are and where you've been and where you're going and it all seems like a total waste of time. One of those days when there is no light at the end of the tunnel...one of those days when you know there's good, but you just can't seem to see it through all the shit. Well, that is today...and I'm not even PMSing.
I'm tired. The sun is hiding behind all the fog. I just want to go home and get under the covers and stay there...forever.
I'm tired. The sun is hiding behind all the fog. I just want to go home and get under the covers and stay there...forever.
Monday, January 5, 2009
ambiguity
So, today my life path changed somewhat...well, more than somewhat and I unfortunately cannot tell anyone about it. I'm dying to get it off my chest and need to lean on my friends right now, but I can't really. So this post is my way of getting it out.
This change is defiantly something that I've wanted, but I really wanted it to happen in my own time frame. And now that it IS happening I'm having several waves of emotion - from total shock to fear to stress...I think the emotions noted would have been drastically different if things had happened a bit differently.
I'm thankful that some things have been set in motion to make this change a bit easier, but I'm still not really ready. I do know though that I AM on the right path. This is the way things were meant to happen...I can feel it. Whether it's true or not, putting it in writing makes me feel better at least.
I did have something else happen today that I thought would make the first thing a bit easier to swallow, but it didn't...it actually made it a bit harder and gave me way more to think about. Frick!
Damn, this is a hard blog to write. It's all good. I'm sure my friends will feel the same when I'm able to tell my tale...but for now I'm dealing with it as best I can.
On another note, my instructor thinks my flying is at commercial standards! wow, huh??!!? He says I'm ready for my instrument check ride after my next flight so I really have to get on the ball and study my ass off for the oral. I'm not there yet in that regard. I have some time to study tomorrow after work and have some ground school on Wednesday...so maybe check ride next week. From there it's just a few short hours before my commercial check ride - then who knows what...need to network more!
This change is defiantly something that I've wanted, but I really wanted it to happen in my own time frame. And now that it IS happening I'm having several waves of emotion - from total shock to fear to stress...I think the emotions noted would have been drastically different if things had happened a bit differently.
I'm thankful that some things have been set in motion to make this change a bit easier, but I'm still not really ready. I do know though that I AM on the right path. This is the way things were meant to happen...I can feel it. Whether it's true or not, putting it in writing makes me feel better at least.
I did have something else happen today that I thought would make the first thing a bit easier to swallow, but it didn't...it actually made it a bit harder and gave me way more to think about. Frick!
Damn, this is a hard blog to write. It's all good. I'm sure my friends will feel the same when I'm able to tell my tale...but for now I'm dealing with it as best I can.
On another note, my instructor thinks my flying is at commercial standards! wow, huh??!!? He says I'm ready for my instrument check ride after my next flight so I really have to get on the ball and study my ass off for the oral. I'm not there yet in that regard. I have some time to study tomorrow after work and have some ground school on Wednesday...so maybe check ride next week. From there it's just a few short hours before my commercial check ride - then who knows what...need to network more!
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Back!
Wow, well...it's been a long, long, long time since I've blogged. It's not that nothing has been going on, it's just that I have not been very motivated to write and I have been very, very busy.
Here are a few key points from the past several months:
Oh, I'm quite excited about my flight yesterday. It might not seem like much, but I landed at Daytona International Airport at max speed (90k) solely by instrument (ILS)...not looking past the control panel until I was approximately 20ft off the ground. This was the first time I've flown the heli that fast so the approach was a bit more intimidating than normal. I did good though. :o)
Today is NYE so Happy New Year to everyone! Ian's mom will be landing this afternoon for her long weekend visit. We will be going out to the Ranch for a sleep over. Mary Beth is preparing a big Moroccan dinner. Then on Thursday I will be taking my grandmother to a block party/meet and greet in her neighborhood (fun, fun).
I'm looking forward to a very productive 2009. I have lots of things in my life that I want to work on and improve. I know that the resolutions are always the same and usually short lived, but I'm going to try harder and actually ask my friends for help. I'm not a strong as always thought I was.
So, here's to a good new year!! Much love to all!!
Here are a few key points from the past several months:
- I got my private pilots license
- I changed flight schools and am now flying in Spruce Creek. It's closer, cheaper and I really enjoy my instructor. He has a lot of real world knowledge and seems to make the instrument training more understandable and manageable.
- I passed my instrument written exam and have just a few more hours before my check ride
- I went on holiday to South Africa...now my favorite place I've traveled to...so much so that I'm going back in 2009 and might possibly buy a house there.
- My grandfather passed away. It was expected, but not really...if that makes any sense. It was also a long, short road. Regardless...I'm sure he's much happier than he was living with a body that was deteriorating and not allowing him to live life as he wanted.
As I mentioned above, it's not long before I get my instrument rating and then from there I will finish up my commercial rating. I think I will probably finish up with everything in January. From there I will have to find some way to build hours in order to get a 'real' flying job. Most people become flight instructors, but this is plan B for me (anyone who has ever driven me around in a car can understand why I might not be too happy being passenger in a helicopter being flown by someone who has no clue what they are doing). At this point I'm hoping for a job flying tours or maybe photo flights...hell I don't know...anyone know someone with a helicopter that might give me a job??
Oh, I'm quite excited about my flight yesterday. It might not seem like much, but I landed at Daytona International Airport at max speed (90k) solely by instrument (ILS)...not looking past the control panel until I was approximately 20ft off the ground. This was the first time I've flown the heli that fast so the approach was a bit more intimidating than normal. I did good though. :o)
Today is NYE so Happy New Year to everyone! Ian's mom will be landing this afternoon for her long weekend visit. We will be going out to the Ranch for a sleep over. Mary Beth is preparing a big Moroccan dinner. Then on Thursday I will be taking my grandmother to a block party/meet and greet in her neighborhood (fun, fun).
I'm looking forward to a very productive 2009. I have lots of things in my life that I want to work on and improve. I know that the resolutions are always the same and usually short lived, but I'm going to try harder and actually ask my friends for help. I'm not a strong as always thought I was.
So, here's to a good new year!! Much love to all!!
Monday, September 8, 2008
Best Saturday ever!
Saturday started with a bright and early trip down to Orlando Executive Airport for my inaugural flight as a licensed Private Pilot. Against mine and my instructors better judgment, Ian talked me into flying him up to Deep Woods Ranch. It's not that it's too far or beyond my capabilities...the instructors at my school just thought it would be best to do it with an instructor first in case something unusual came up. The day before the flight I designed my flight plan and decided it would be fine...I didn't' have to traverse any major airspace and I have GPS (or so I thought).
Fast forward to Ian and I in the helicopter. I'm doing my preflight and programming my GPS to what I thought was Deep Woods Ranch...well, it turns out that since it's a private airport it's not loaded into the GPS so I would have to trust my flight plan and actually use my chart in order to locate the tiny airstrip located somewhere amongst the National Forest (insert panic here).
It came up at the party the night before that we'd be flying up so Justin said that he would be there to take pictures...cool! So Ian texted him to let him know when we were airborne.
So, back in the air. I start to follow my flight plan and would you believe that my navigational skills were smack on! My calculated timing between way points was as close to exact as possible...I actually amazed myself. We passed by Locals Tower and could see the roof of the hangar just ahead. I told Kim that I would do a flyby before landing so I came around and flew down the runway and there were about 15 people out in front of the hanger yelling and cheering me on! It was awesome to have all those people there to support me and who thought I was cool ;o).
After shutting down we chilled for a bit and had a cup of coffee before taking a few people on rides. Almost everyone who got a ride had never even been in a helicopter before so it was awesome to be the one to share that experience with them!
It's time to head back now so Ian gets in the helicopter and gets Maizee ready for her release. I climb to 600 feet and fly back down the runway. Ian releases Maizee for an eternity at the Ranch with my Mom. :o) It was cool that I could be the pilot, but I didn't get to see it so thank you so much for the awesome pictures Justin!! I will post a few as soon as I get them.
When we got back to the airport my instructor presented me with a bottle of wine, a balloon and an awkward Norwegian hug :o).
From here Ian took me to lunch at Bahama Breeze where the food was awesome and I was able to enjoy my favorite Mojito. What a great way to end a great morning...except, it doesn't end here.
Mary Beth is selling a house that has a pool out back. I don't know how long it's been since the house has been occupied, but the pool is totally green and infested with hundreds, if not thousands of tadpoles in different stages of development. The pool boy was scheduled to come out on Monday to shock the pool. Mary Beth thought it would be really cool if we could save the tadpoles from their looming fate. So we showed up armed with nets and buckets and managed to save several hundred. We relocated the lucky ones to a tiny pond out at the Ranch. I feel really bad that we couldn't save them all. I'm hoping that many of them finished developing over the rest of the weekend and made it to safety before being burned to death by nasty pool chemicals.
I can not remember ever having such an uplifting, happy day in my entire life! Thanks to all of you who were able to share it with me!! I'm still trying to wipe the perma-smile off my face!!
Fast forward to Ian and I in the helicopter. I'm doing my preflight and programming my GPS to what I thought was Deep Woods Ranch...well, it turns out that since it's a private airport it's not loaded into the GPS so I would have to trust my flight plan and actually use my chart in order to locate the tiny airstrip located somewhere amongst the National Forest (insert panic here).
It came up at the party the night before that we'd be flying up so Justin said that he would be there to take pictures...cool! So Ian texted him to let him know when we were airborne.
Oh, I forgot to mention that while I was getting dressed I had the brilliant idea that we could scatter Maizee's ashes (yeah, I know it's been around 2 years, but we were waiting for that perfect moment to come along).
So, back in the air. I start to follow my flight plan and would you believe that my navigational skills were smack on! My calculated timing between way points was as close to exact as possible...I actually amazed myself. We passed by Locals Tower and could see the roof of the hangar just ahead. I told Kim that I would do a flyby before landing so I came around and flew down the runway and there were about 15 people out in front of the hanger yelling and cheering me on! It was awesome to have all those people there to support me and who thought I was cool ;o).
After shutting down we chilled for a bit and had a cup of coffee before taking a few people on rides. Almost everyone who got a ride had never even been in a helicopter before so it was awesome to be the one to share that experience with them!
It's time to head back now so Ian gets in the helicopter and gets Maizee ready for her release. I climb to 600 feet and fly back down the runway. Ian releases Maizee for an eternity at the Ranch with my Mom. :o) It was cool that I could be the pilot, but I didn't get to see it so thank you so much for the awesome pictures Justin!! I will post a few as soon as I get them.
When we got back to the airport my instructor presented me with a bottle of wine, a balloon and an awkward Norwegian hug :o).
From here Ian took me to lunch at Bahama Breeze where the food was awesome and I was able to enjoy my favorite Mojito. What a great way to end a great morning...except, it doesn't end here.
Mary Beth is selling a house that has a pool out back. I don't know how long it's been since the house has been occupied, but the pool is totally green and infested with hundreds, if not thousands of tadpoles in different stages of development. The pool boy was scheduled to come out on Monday to shock the pool. Mary Beth thought it would be really cool if we could save the tadpoles from their looming fate. So we showed up armed with nets and buckets and managed to save several hundred. We relocated the lucky ones to a tiny pond out at the Ranch. I feel really bad that we couldn't save them all. I'm hoping that many of them finished developing over the rest of the weekend and made it to safety before being burned to death by nasty pool chemicals.
And finally from here we made our way to meet Hannah & Joe and Kay & Ron for sushi dinner at my favorite Thai restaurant.
I can not remember ever having such an uplifting, happy day in my entire life! Thanks to all of you who were able to share it with me!! I'm still trying to wipe the perma-smile off my face!!
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Just around the corner
Well...after a 3 month roller coaster ride it finally looks like I'm ready to do my check ride for my Private Pilots License. It is a big personal hurdle, but a small one in the grand scheme of things. I'm hoping to get the test done next week. It consists of an oral and practical exam. I'm not 100% ready this second, but am pretty confident that I will be ready next week...just need to hope that I don't fuck up.
Next on the docket is my instrument rating. Apparently this one is quite difficult. I'm signed up for a ground course that runs for a week from Sept 9 - 12. It's from 6 - 10 pm...10 pm being my bed time so I'm not sure how this is going to work out for me. I'm currently looking for a place to shack up in Orlando that week so I don't have to drive home late at night then get up early in the morning for work. If I can find a place I will try to do morning flights and work in the afternoon and then class at night. It's only for a week so I'm thinking I will survive.
Anyone trust me for a ride???
Next on the docket is my instrument rating. Apparently this one is quite difficult. I'm signed up for a ground course that runs for a week from Sept 9 - 12. It's from 6 - 10 pm...10 pm being my bed time so I'm not sure how this is going to work out for me. I'm currently looking for a place to shack up in Orlando that week so I don't have to drive home late at night then get up early in the morning for work. If I can find a place I will try to do morning flights and work in the afternoon and then class at night. It's only for a week so I'm thinking I will survive.
Anyone trust me for a ride???
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Flying solo
Well, I'm flying solo! It's quite exciting and quite boring at the same time. Ian's a bit disappointed that I'm not more excited, but oh well...that's just me. I have accumulated 3 hours solo time, but continue to get hosed by the afternoon thunderstorms. I'm on the schedule to do my dual cross country and both solo cross countries this weekend. I will be flying from Orlando Executive to Titusville back to Apopka then back to Orlando. I have to admit that it's all quite intimidating. It would totally suck to get lost and end up having to call Roar to come find my ass. Also, radio work at different airports is a bit of a challenge. I'm hoping to do my duel and solo back to back so that everything will be fresh in my mind.
Flying solo in our practice area is a tad boring. All I'm allowed to practice is normal take offs and normal landings and hovering. Not that I don't need the take off and landing practice, but after an hour it gets a bit monotonous. Another thing about flying solo is that I'm becoming more and more aware of what's on the ground. Before I didn't think too much about it because I knew that if we had an engine failure that Roar would be there to save us. Now, it's up to me and there aren't really a lot of outs on the east side of the practice area. God help me if I have an engine failure over there. It's all roof tops and power lines.
So, please help me pray to the weather Gods that I have decent cross country this weekend.
Flying solo in our practice area is a tad boring. All I'm allowed to practice is normal take offs and normal landings and hovering. Not that I don't need the take off and landing practice, but after an hour it gets a bit monotonous. Another thing about flying solo is that I'm becoming more and more aware of what's on the ground. Before I didn't think too much about it because I knew that if we had an engine failure that Roar would be there to save us. Now, it's up to me and there aren't really a lot of outs on the east side of the practice area. God help me if I have an engine failure over there. It's all roof tops and power lines.
So, please help me pray to the weather Gods that I have decent cross country this weekend.
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